I was looking forward to this book so, so much. But, twas not to be.
30 Second Book Review #2: Weaveworld, by Clive Barker
Weaveworld is a fat-arse new-weird fantasy about a land of magical horny elves somehow woven into a carpet so they can conceal themselves from an age-old enemy called the Scourge. Carpet is found by a man in 1980's London, worlds unravel, all hell breaks loose. Book began at a nice pace, characters seemed interesting enough, but Barker's style soon began to grate.
This man can't write for shit. Barker acts like words under four syllables have been banned by national decree. He constantly skips over scenes that would have been fascinating while spending pages and pages describing mundane crud. Villains are cardboard cutouts, and he makes sure to introduce them with a page or two describing exactly why they are evil and how they've been evil in the past, and possibly how they will continue to be evil in the future. Also, whenever something gets too complex to describe, Barker bitches out and uses vague phrases like "It was a multitude of terrible geometries, an unholy marriage of man and beast and all-seeing eyes." What does that MEAN, Barker? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
Finally, and most importantly: the Weaveworld itself, which is supposed to be a land of infinite wonder and magic, is boring. It's a quaint English village full of elves and magically delicious fruit. The only piece of real imagination Barker showed in this novel was the desert temple where the Scourge hides. Everything else is painfully middle-of-the-road. Ignore this book.
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9 Responses
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Yeah, that sounds pretty damn mediocre.
Come on, Ruzkin, don't hold back. If you didn't like it, just say so!
Shit! I hope you like my book when it comes out! I think I'd slit my throat if I got a review like that.
@Graham - That was a pretty MILD review, you should see my review of Marcher =P When I don't like something, I really don't like it.
Better honest than sugar coated, and at least you said why.
Anyway, sounds like a poor echo of Pratchett's The Carpet People (which rocked).
har...recenlty a friend of mine lent em a copy of 'Hellbound Heart' I decided to flip through the book at random to see if each page I landed on would sport the word 'Blood' it and it did...sometimes three times.
cuz...yanno I heard that blood is pretty scary
I didn't end up reading it, I read 'the Forever War' instead
@Turm - Forever War is one of my favourite books ever ever ever. If you knock it like you knocked Altered Carbon, I'll cry a river.
Well...Altered Carbon was pretty bad...you know there was book from 1988 called 'Voice in the Whirlwind' that sounds kinda to similar to Altered Carbon but feels a bit more appealing to me.
By the way...I tarnished your nice site with a typo
Altered Carbon was awesomely rad and you should be ashamed!
PS - When are we doing dinner? I got caught up today in house inspections
I'm not in Melbourne only erika X'D